I have always loved responsibility. Sadly, no one ever gives it to me. Nobody thinks I have what it takes to handle it.
When I was younger, I too thought I could not handle it, but recently (now that I am in college) I feel like I could handle more things and perform better. Therefore, I tried joining an organization in line with my advocacy. I strive hard to get into it, gaining a little bit of confidence. When I was asked whether I deserved to join, I confidently said yes. Yes, because I knew I had done everything I can in my power to be able to accomplish the tasks given to me.
After being a member, I tried strive even harder for a higher position. Some older members/ leaders were “chosen” by the past people who held the position. Nonetheless, it was still a decision of the body. I tried to sense if the finance head would choose me as a future head, but until now, I sense nothing but his preference for my other co-orgmate. Though I did sense the publicity head show her liking towards me. Sadly she would not stay long enough to appoint me as the next head of publicity.
Well, since being the head of a committee in the organization did not work out as well as I hoped. I applied as a registration assistant. Being an RA would require at least two semesters of training. Today was my last day as a trainee for my first semester.
It is hard, but still I try to do the best I can to make the registration process as easy as possible. I also try to show my good side to the heads. Now, they are deliberating whether who will move on to the next stage of the training. They asked me why I deserve to continue and surprisingly I have an answer for that as well. Someday, I do hope I get to be and official RA and I would hope to be the head of it too.
I realized something after doing these two things, I have the confidence to say I deserve the responsibility because of my hard work. If I was asked if I deserve past responsibilities, I would have said no. But now, I feel like I deserve everything I am about to get. But the biggest question that still plagues my mind is that why do I not have the responsibility? What is the equation for responsibility?
Confidence+ Hard work + ????? = RESPONSIBILITY