April 2, 2012, I shared with you Real Nightmares, which was based on my personal experience with my organization. Yesterday, the entire event was played again, but this time I was one of the voices that guided the blind little ducklings.
Honestly, I do not know what to make of it. At first, I was of course, excited. But through the course of the day, I just felt sorry for all of them. They ran at least 4 km, the entire morning, and went through a series of emotionally scarring activities without even eating lunch or drinking water. Not to mention, their sense of sight was completely cut off in the afternoon sessions.
I was one of them not too long ago.I was the one being screamed at. I was the one soiling my blindfold with tears. Now, I was one of the people making them cry. How did it come to this? Why did it come to this? I thought I was strong enough to resist torturing (yes, I would like to consider it torture) the when the time came, but how come I wasn’t?
But those activities were not meaningless. When I was the one in their positions, I was being taught of the values needed to be instilled in me to become a proper and functional member of the organization. I accepted those ideas without question. Now, I can only hope that the new members have also learned these values, and look beyond what they had to go through.
Whether the process of learning is deemed to be ethical or not is an entirely different issue. But for now, I must once again revisit my ideals and virtues, so that the next time I would be the voice (yes, there will be a next time) that guides them, I would not regret any action I make.